As a hair guide, I feel so lucky to work with people in a very personal way. I don’t just cut or color their hair—I help them feel beautiful, confident, and seen. For many of my clients, their hair is deeply connected to how they see themselves. But over the years, I’ve also seen how hard it can be when hair changes, especially when those changes come from something deeper, like health challenges.
As a Ukrainian immigrant, I know what it’s like to go through big changes—things you didn’t expect or ask for, things that make you feel like you’ve lost part of yourself. And I’ve learned something important: sometimes, we have to adapt to what life gives us, even when it’s painful.
This article comes from my heart. It’s for anyone who’s struggling with changes in their hair or their body, for my fellow stylists who’ve felt the weight of a client’s disappointment, and for anyone who needs a reminder to show themselves kindness.
How Health Affects Hair
Hair is not just for beauty. It’s like a little mirror of what’s happening inside our bodies. When we are healthy, hair grows strong and shiny. But when the body is under stress—whether from illness, surgeries, medications, or even emotional struggles—our hair often suffers.
The truth is, when your body is fighting for survival, it doesn’t care about your hair. It focuses on the most important things: your heart, brain, and other organs. Hair is not the priority.
This is why people who experience health challenges often notice thinning hair, breakage, or even bald spots. It can feel like a betrayal—your body already isn’t working the way it should, and now your hair is changing too. I see this in my clients, and I’ve seen how hard it is for them to accept.
The Emotional Side of Hair Changes
For many women (and men), hair is more than just hair. It’s part of who we are. It’s how we present ourselves to the world. So, when hair starts to change—especially in ways we can’t control—it’s not just a physical issue. It’s emotional, too.
I’ve had clients cry in my chair because their hair no longer looks or feels like it used to. Some blame themselves, thinking they must be doing something wrong. Others blame me, their stylist, because it’s easier to feel angry at someone than to face what’s really happening.
But most of all, I see sadness. Sadness for what was lost. Sadness for the reflection in the mirror that doesn’t feel familiar anymore.
If this is you, I want you to know: you are not alone. And it’s not your fault.
The Role of a Stylist: Doing Our Best with What We Have
As stylists, we always want to help you feel beautiful. When your hair is struggling, we try our best to work with what’s there—to find cuts or styles that make it look its best. But we’re not magicians.
We can’t fix what’s happening inside your body. We can only work with the canvas we’re given. And when that canvas is changing—whether it’s because of health issues, age, or other factors—it’s not always possible to create the results you’re hoping for.
This can be heartbreaking for us, too. I became a hairstylist because I love helping people feel good about themselves. When someone leaves my chair unhappy, it hurts. I want to do more. But sometimes, I can’t.
A Message to Clients
If your hair is changing because of health issues, I want you to hear this: your body is doing the best it can to keep you alive. It’s focusing on what’s most important—your health.
Hair loss or damage is a sign that your body is prioritizing survival. It doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. It doesn’t mean your stylist has failed you. It means your body is asking for patience and care.
Here are some things that may help:
1. Work with a Doctor: Sometimes, hair changes are caused by things like hormonal imbalances, nutritional deficiencies, or stress. A doctor or specialist can help you understand what’s happening and how to address it.
2. Adjust Your Expectations: Your hair may not look or feel the same as it used to. That’s okay. It doesn’t mean you can’t still feel beautiful.
3. Focus on What You Can Control: Maybe you can try a new style that works better for your hair’s current state. Maybe you can use products that make your hair feel softer or healthier.
4. Be Kind to Yourself: You are more than your hair. Your worth is not tied to how much hair you have or how perfect it looks.
A Message to Fellow Stylists
To my fellow stylists, I see you. I know how hard it is when a client is unhappy, especially when you’ve done your best.
Remember this: you can only do so much. You can’t fix what’s happening inside someone’s body. All you can do is listen, offer support, and work with what you’re given.
It’s also okay to set boundaries. If a client’s expectations are more than you can meet, or if their frustration starts to feel like a personal attack, it’s okay to step back. You deserve to protect your own emotional health, too.
Final Thoughts
Hair changes can be one of the hardest things to face. They challenge our confidence and force us to confront things we may not want to. But they’re also a reminder of something important: our bodies are resilient. They are always working to heal and protect us, even when it comes at the cost of our hair.
If you’re struggling with your hair right now, I hope you’ll take a moment to show yourself some kindness. Your hair may be changing, but it’s not the sum of who you are.
And if you’re a stylist reading this, keep doing your best. Our work isn’t just about hair—it’s about empathy, connection, and helping people feel seen and cared for.
From one immigrant hairstylist to anyone reading this, I want to remind you: life is full of changes, some harder than others. But there’s beauty in every stage, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Keep going. Keep adapting. And above all, keep being kind to yourself and others.
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